THE "I'LL TEACH HIM TO LOVE ME" LOVE STRATEGY
THE "I'LL TEACH HIM TO LOVE ME" LOVE STRATEGY
Let me ask you an important question...
Have you ever noticed yourself trying to
teach a man how to love and be with you, and how
to have a "real" relationship?
You know what I'm talking about.
If you're like lots of women, then you do this
when the guy you're with starts to take you for
granted after the initial "honeymoon" phase is
over.
That "magic spark" starts to feel like it's
fading, and it seems like your man just doesn't
think about what it is you want, or how a
relationship is supposed to keep growing and
stay alive and well.
So you sit down one night and talk to him about
it. You give him examples of the kinds of things
he USED to do that he hasn't done in a long time.
Like plan special dates, buy you flowers, have
deep, long talks into the night...
The next day you get a dozen roses delivered
to your desk, and they're from him.
Ok. That's nice... but c'mon.
Getting that bouquet of roses delivered to
your office doesn't really feel so spectacular
if you JUST had a discussion the night before
about how you wish he were more ROMANTIC... and
how you miss the little surprises.
It's like you had placed an order, and he
delivered on it.
Not much romance here, huh?
And for some funny weird reason, getting what
you wanted doesn't feel the same since you had
to ask for it.
It's like the magic is gone, right?
I've felt this one myself as a man.
I get it.
As a woman, here's the important thing to
think about and notice about what you usually do
with a man...
How do you go about showing a man how to
be a better lover and partner to you if he
doesn't "get it" on his own?
And how do you do this without having to spell
it out for him and ruining the good feelings that
come from "unexpected" and more genuine gestures?
Here's the "usual" approach I see women take.
They end up trying to teach men, who don't
get it, the absolute basics about loving, being
a good partner and about how to have a good
relationship.
To show you exactly what I'm talking about,
I'll tell you a short story.
It goes like this:
A man and woman have been seeing each other
for awhile and they've both grown pretty close.
Things are starting to slowly get "serious".
It feels comfortable and natural.
But there's something else going on for the
woman here...
Something that she hasn't mentioned, but it's
bugging her and lurking in the back of her mind.
She's never really had "the talk" or anything
like it with her guy, so she's NOT EXACTLY SURE
where things are at and what everything means.
And as her feelings are growing she's starting
to feel something awful inside-
She's starting to feel VULNERABLE and UNCERTAIN.
Not knowing exactly what's happening in the
guy's mind, and him not talking or expressing his
feelings is seriously starting to drive her CRAZY.
Her unconscious fears start to take over.
That easy and ever-present attraction,
magnetism and connection isn't there like it
used to be.
In fact, the guy is starting to withdraw
and she picks up on all kinds of weird
feelings and behaviors that she didn't see in
him before when things were fun, easy and "new"
together.
He spends a lot of time on his own hobbies
and activities without inviting her along or
planning something they can do TOGETHER.
He seems constantly preoccupied with work or
other concerns and not so interested in those
deep, revealing conversations they used to have.
And worst of all, lately they've been having
more disagreements than "connections."
He doesn't say "I love you" quite as much and
generally isn't as physically affectionate as
he used to be.
And now she's not sure what to do or how
to get things back to how things were.
So she comes up with an idea-
She wants to be the one that leads him to
understand that they DESERVE BETTER, and that
they can have a beautiful love-life together if
he listens to her, chooses her and commits to
making it work.
So she thinks that if she could just have
the chance to really TELL HIM how she FEELS ABOUT
HIM that he'd see the light, understand where
things are going wrong, and he'd come running
into her arms.
She becomes more physically affectionate
toward HIM, almost as if by touching and
caressing him she will elicit some sort of
"love response."
She tries to talk to him about how he's
feeling or if he's unhappy and why. She works
hard on being understanding and "open".
By doing all this, she hopes to be able to
teach him how to give and receive love, and give
him everything he's always wanted in a woman so
they'd be happy and in love.
End of story.
So tell me, how do you think the story turned
out for the woman?
Did her man see the light?
Did they live happily ever after?
I want you to think about this story and see
how it applies to your own life.
Are you starting to see some similarities?
Have you ever noticed yourself trying to
teach a man how to love and be with you, and how
to have a "real" relationship?
You know what I'm talking about.
If you're like lots of women, then you do this
when the guy you're with starts to take you for
granted after the initial "honeymoon" phase is
over.
That "magic spark" starts to feel like it's
fading, and it seems like your man just doesn't
think about what it is you want, or how a
relationship is supposed to keep growing and
stay alive and well.
So you sit down one night and talk to him about
it. You give him examples of the kinds of things
he USED to do that he hasn't done in a long time.
Like plan special dates, buy you flowers, have
deep, long talks into the night...
The next day you get a dozen roses delivered
to your desk, and they're from him.
Ok. That's nice... but c'mon.
Getting that bouquet of roses delivered to
your office doesn't really feel so spectacular
if you JUST had a discussion the night before
about how you wish he were more ROMANTIC... and
how you miss the little surprises.
It's like you had placed an order, and he
delivered on it.
Not much romance here, huh?
And for some funny weird reason, getting what
you wanted doesn't feel the same since you had
to ask for it.
It's like the magic is gone, right?
I've felt this one myself as a man.
I get it.
As a woman, here's the important thing to
think about and notice about what you usually do
with a man...
How do you go about showing a man how to
be a better lover and partner to you if he
doesn't "get it" on his own?
And how do you do this without having to spell
it out for him and ruining the good feelings that
come from "unexpected" and more genuine gestures?
Here's the "usual" approach I see women take.
They end up trying to teach men, who don't
get it, the absolute basics about loving, being
a good partner and about how to have a good
relationship.
To show you exactly what I'm talking about,
I'll tell you a short story.
It goes like this:
A man and woman have been seeing each other
for awhile and they've both grown pretty close.
Things are starting to slowly get "serious".
It feels comfortable and natural.
But there's something else going on for the
woman here...
Something that she hasn't mentioned, but it's
bugging her and lurking in the back of her mind.
She's never really had "the talk" or anything
like it with her guy, so she's NOT EXACTLY SURE
where things are at and what everything means.
And as her feelings are growing she's starting
to feel something awful inside-
She's starting to feel VULNERABLE and UNCERTAIN.
Not knowing exactly what's happening in the
guy's mind, and him not talking or expressing his
feelings is seriously starting to drive her CRAZY.
Her unconscious fears start to take over.
That easy and ever-present attraction,
magnetism and connection isn't there like it
used to be.
In fact, the guy is starting to withdraw
and she picks up on all kinds of weird
feelings and behaviors that she didn't see in
him before when things were fun, easy and "new"
together.
He spends a lot of time on his own hobbies
and activities without inviting her along or
planning something they can do TOGETHER.
He seems constantly preoccupied with work or
other concerns and not so interested in those
deep, revealing conversations they used to have.
And worst of all, lately they've been having
more disagreements than "connections."
He doesn't say "I love you" quite as much and
generally isn't as physically affectionate as
he used to be.
And now she's not sure what to do or how
to get things back to how things were.
So she comes up with an idea-
She wants to be the one that leads him to
understand that they DESERVE BETTER, and that
they can have a beautiful love-life together if
he listens to her, chooses her and commits to
making it work.
So she thinks that if she could just have
the chance to really TELL HIM how she FEELS ABOUT
HIM that he'd see the light, understand where
things are going wrong, and he'd come running
into her arms.
She becomes more physically affectionate
toward HIM, almost as if by touching and
caressing him she will elicit some sort of
"love response."
She tries to talk to him about how he's
feeling or if he's unhappy and why. She works
hard on being understanding and "open".
By doing all this, she hopes to be able to
teach him how to give and receive love, and give
him everything he's always wanted in a woman so
they'd be happy and in love.
End of story.
So tell me, how do you think the story turned
out for the woman?
Did her man see the light?
Did they live happily ever after?
I want you to think about this story and see
how it applies to your own life.
Are you starting to see some similarities?
ENJOY READING!
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